Did you know only 10% of midlife women own their own style?
What do I mean by that?
She’s a woman who, regardless of her size, shape, age, ethnicity or beliefs expresses herself in an authentic and unique way which empowers her lifestyle, feeds her soul, boosts her confidence, transforms her life and puts her in a frame as a ‘hot’ woman. In a society where ageism and patriarchy still exist being 50 plus is an asset, not a liability.
We CAN have it all. You may not agree with that, nor want be a ‘hot’ woman, but hear me out.
Who comes to mind as a ‘hot’ woman, but also a hot ‘older’ woman? Judi Dench, Ita Buttrose, Helen Mirren, Cher and other living treasures come to mind, and not just now, but they were always ‘hot’ women. Despite their differences they have one thing in common. They look years younger than their actual numbers. They all have their own style which has become their trademark over time. They each have found their ‘secret sauce’.
Age is a number. Old is an attitude.
Let’s go on a discovery tour and find out why we never really knew ourselves, or some of us lose our way, and how we can find our ‘secret sauce’ (again).
No matter how much you want to deny it and hide from it, our hair changes colour, our body changes shape, our skin loses elasticity and clarity and our makeup doesn’t go on the same way for the same result. We have updated our TVs, kitchens, cars and sometimes relationships. As life has evolved, our habits and ways of doing things have not. We are still using those old techniques we used to do in almost every aspect of our life up to that point, but now it’s not working so well.
Then, if that’s not enough, an unexpected event occurs. Stuff happened! Something buggered life up as we know it, and we don’t know how to un-bugger it.
There is an infidelity, an illness, a redundancy, a death or some other trauma. It’s at this point that a time of transition is enforced. Something or someone has created mayhem. In a heart-beat, life will never be the same again and everything you know and have done is questioned, initiating a total rethink and search for a strategy in doing something different. But how, and what?
Midlife is often about personal transition.
From what once ‘was’, navigating the ‘now’ to a desired ‘future’ suddenly and urgently becomes the main reason women react and are motivated to consider a makeover, not just of their look, but of their whole lives.
On the other-hand, many midlife women are recognizing the need for transformation and are being proactive and planning their future by purposefully changing careers, going into business or even considering flying solo. Therefore, they recognise the need to re-evaluate their image and sense of ‘self’.
It’s fast becoming the more frequent and desired emerging trend for midlife women now to be starting their transitions around the age of 40 into the next chapter of her life, for any number of reasons, some planned changes, some not.
Some may call it a midlife crisis. It’s about knowing what works for you, taking into account the life you want to be living, and the quality of the relationships you want in the environment that nurtures and supports you.
It’s also what Life and Love Coaches talk about: Change is normal. Nothing is forever, the tide comes in, the tide goes out. When we are faced with adversity, we are presented the perfect opportunity to explore how to navigate and expand your options for a higher benefit, but difficult to navigate when you are walking on virgin ground where you have never been before.
You never know what you don’t know until you know it.
We have so much yet to give in our lives and often we fail to recognise we have a wealth of knowledge, resilience, experience and so much wisdom. We have overcome so much and are still overcoming so much, tapping into our resources and learning new skills, leaning into a new phase of our lives, yet at times, we still live in our past. Midlife women can really have it all. But, Just like renovating a house. . .
Before there can be a transformation, there first needs to be a demolition.
For many, a makeover includes redefining your identity, realigning your head and your heart, especially for those who feel disempowered by illness, bereavement, divorce, bankruptcy and any other attack or impact on their fulfilment. With guidance and know-how can be the most impactful transformation when authenticity is maintained.
Once a woman goes through the process of experiencing a makeover in any area of her existence, feeling the power of reevaluating her life, her personal image, discovering her archetype and getting out of her head into her heart, she will have that understanding of what works for her. It also presents an opportunity to learn how to navigate different trends and not be controlled by them.
Trends come and go, but your own individual style remains authentically yours. It’s a learning process, even though over the years it will evolve and change as you evolve and change, and it’s sometimes challenging not to get caught up in the seasonal fashion changes that come and go so quickly, often within 6 months, depending on where on the fashion cycle you made your purchase.
Now more than any other time previously, we need to release those darlings we love so much which only sabotage us. We need to remain current and empowered so it’s important our external story tells that and shows that we are strong, resilient, yet soft and confident and not stuck in a rut or from a time 30 years previously. You are not that woman anymore. You are now more.
You will be able to identify how you can you take these trends and set them into what you already know about yourself , your style archetype at an innate level and not being pigeon-holed into a type; your body signature and what works for you and what doesn’t, understanding your style foundation and then being able to apply that.
No matter the age, women still want to stay relevant, visible and beautiful in their own personal style without too much effort. However, effortless style is a myth and is a bit like watching a swan glide gracefully and smoothly over the water, and there’s a great flurry of activity beneath the surface.
It takes some practice for the holistic approach to making it all come together from the inside out and getting the outside to authentically reflect the game on the inside. And over time, sometimes quickly, sometimes with baby steps and with guidance, it comes together.
How do I know this?
I am a midlife woman too, and I’ve walked in many pairs of shoes. I could be described as a woman in my Third Act, not just my second 50. In fact, I once was 6.5 years of age, but someone moved my decimal point when I wasn’t looking.
But I still want to finish strong, vital and fiercely independent, just like I was when I was 6!
I’m not done yet. And neither are you. There is an opportunity for you also to go on your style discovery tour: a fun and fascinating time learning new strategies on so many levels to bring joie de vivre into your Feisty 40’s, Fabulous 50’s, Sexy 60’s, Sensuous 70’s and Audacious 80’s, no matter what life throws at you!
Give yourself permission to find your ‘secret sauce’. I’ve got you. I see you. Contact or Call me if you want to have a chat to see if there is a benefit for you.
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